Negatives and Positives of Being a Superhero Single Parent
Because of the trauma and upset that might have, and usually does come from being a single parent, it is easy to focus on all of the negatives of being a single parent. There is no doubt that we feel and have to work hard around not letting the negatives swallow us up and stop us in our tracks. But know that you are not alone in feeling this way. Plus lots and lots of our members have said how these feelings pass with time, and don’t feel as intense or cause as much sadness as it does in the beginning of becoming a single parent.
Here are lots that have been said by lots of our single parent members:
Loneliness
Everything falls on my shoulders
Overwhelmed with to do list
Feeling isolated
Financial strain
Stigma attached to being a single parent
Don’t feel supported
Not being able to just pop out for a pint of milk
However, almost all of these negatives are balanced out with a positive. It is important that we remember and absorb these, so that when we have an inner critic and loud voice in our head saying, “I’m really lonely”, that we show ourselves some self love and self care. That we send those parts of being a single parent some extra patience, love and attention.
But also to reflect on that loneliness might push you to join a new class, go on an SPW social or try something new to make new connections.
“Some of the nicest and people I feel most connected to I’ve met on my single parent journey.”
“Not everyone in a relationship is happy and not everyone who is single is lonely. I remember how lonely I felt in the relationship that I left”
Now let’s look at the positives of being a single parent and compare them with the negative list, there are lots of links that we can make.
Sense of relief that comes with relying on yourself
No arguing between adults
Sense of independence
Your rules apply
Your money
Your remote control
Bed to yourself
Sense of achievement
Special bond with children
Extra ambition and drive
Inner extra strength
Resilience
Freedom
It is very easy to focus on the negatives and be stuck seeing all of the bad things but we have to accept that there are a lot of positives of being a single parent, especially if we were in a difficult relationship. The positives outweigh the negatives always, we can all share these joys and achievements. It is so important to acknowledge what we have achieved so far.